I am not sure whether I would say that I am a hoarder to the scale and proportion to those you see on the documentaries about hoarding (some may disagree!). But I have noticed that the amount of belongings I have seems to be significantly larger than most.
What do I hoard?
Artworks and projects from the past
Art materials and objects/collections with potential usefulness
Acquired items (inherited or purchased)
Clothes and fabrics
Sentimental items like birthday cards and letters
Why do I hoard?
I am not sure precisely but I can refer to a number of potential influences: my mother is a hoarder/collector and seems to have an inability to confront problems/let things go, I have learnt this behaviour as it has been my primary influence whilst growing up. She has then given items to me that she has struggled to part with.
When I was growing up, we did not have very much money so there was a lot of emphasis on not throwing things away as it was wasteful. This included food as well. These days, I am an avid recycler and feel overwhelming levels of inappropriate guilt when I put things in a black bin bag.
One of my favourite past times has meant my collection keeps on growing, I struggle with impulse control and my chosen dopamine hit involves going to charity shops and bargain hunting. I know there are worse things to feel obsessed about but this is one of mine. It is an outlet for stress and anxiety. It has distracted me from what is worrying me and allowed me to escape reality momentarily. I like the excitement of the possibility of finding new items to add to my collection and pondering over where they came from and what I could use them for. However, due to high levels anxiety, I have often acquired items and then put them away and dissociated from the entire experience.
Last year, I created an artwork in my shed studio when I used nail polishes to paint two of the windows. I found this a therapeutic way to reduce and sort through my collection of nail polishes that had amounted to over 200+ over the last few years. I had been into painting phonecases and nails in a big way, particularly whilst I was living in South Korea. I used to paint other students nails in return for some new nail polish to add to the collection.
Over the last year or so, I have become interested in exploring collections and people's relationship to their collections. I have acquired various postage stamps, coins and notes from many different countries around the world. I have started to make arrangements of these, first - the 99p collections of stamps available for purchase in a charity shop in Newcastle Under Lyme was the catalyst for this. I liked the idea of creating financially accessible works of art. The postage stamp being a miniature work of art itself in my opinion.
Moving fowards
I would like to continue to utilise my collections to create new artworks as this will help me part with them and realise a new potential. In terms of working with others, I am interested in meeting others in the local area who have experience of hoarding or collecting specific items and telling their stories through exhibitions and installations.
Recently, I have began with working through my collections and an inherited collection of postage stamps to piece together new artworks.
More to come, stay tuned!
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